What a hiatus!

I have not been around these parts in a minute! I’ve been using another medium to blog about some things near and dear that I don’t necessarily need everyone to know about but have to work through. With that, plus school, meetings, work, standing appointments, choir, orchestra, and dating, I’ve been incredibly busy.

Crazy how life gets good isn’t it?

Have you ever taken into consideration the random articles found on the roadways? I’m curious. I mentioned this on my Facebook, seeing a random shoe in the median. The responses were varied – some wondered, like me, if a person was so angry that throwing a shoe out of the window was the only natural response. Others thought that perhaps something terrible happened. One person said a ‘friend of hers’ thought that it was proof of an alien abduction. But I mean, I have seen some weird things on the roadside. Baby seat. Couch. Couch cushion. Bookshelf. Shoe. Backpack. I can’t imagine that all of these things bounced out of the back of a truck.

Sometimes I look at pictures of space, and of Earth, and of our Universe and I just get overwhelmed. Does that ever happen to you with anything? I just think about our planets in orbit around the sun, and how incredible it is that such a thing exists at all, and how so many things happen in such a big world that is actually tiny in comparison to the solar system it resides in while hurtling through space. Sometimes it’s a challenge for me to wrap my mind around the god thing, but when I think of all this, I’m convinced that the name doesn’t matter – there’s something out there bigger than me and I’m grateful.

Think about weather, and tides, and how plants and humans help each other out, and tell me that it wasn’t by design. Now look, I’m a firm believer in science and I’m not saying that the world was created in “7 days” by a supreme being. I don’t think there’s a puppet master pulling strings. What I am saying is that it isn’t just coincidence that humans breathe in oxygen and breathe out carbon dioxide, and that plants absorb carbon dioxide and emit oxygen. That’s one of many examples that I could provide, but I think at this point I’m starting to ramble. It’s just powerful stuff.

I’m *this* close to home-ownership again! Also *this* close to being done with class for the semester. Orchestra concert was Sunday and went off well. I had a few people in the audience this time which was pretty cool. Choir concert is in a month. Closing date for the house would be in a month. I’m dating a neat guy. I’m doing personal training at the gym, I’m sponsoring a gal who seems to really be trying, I’m participating in service commitments…

Basically what I’m saying is I’m so busy I think that sometimes I skate by on adrenaline and caffeine alone. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

I have a few friends who openly protest Thanksgiving, stating that America is celebrating genocide of the Native American population, and I know there are many others who believe that way. Lots of protests by Native American tribes take place on Thanksgiving. On the other hand, many Native Americans are supportive of Thanksgiving, as the main purpose of the day is to give thanks to whatever you believe in for the things we have in life. I think initially it was a day of thanks for the first successful harvest. Of course, there are those who will say history has been changed and what the books say does not accurately reflect what really happened. I guess we’ll never know for sure.What I love is that everyone is entitled to believe what they want. As long as you don’t force your beliefs on me, we’re good.

That being said, I love Thanksgiving, with all of the drama of trying to get the food prepared at the same time, making sure the potatoes aren’t too lumpy or too smooth. I swear, someday I’m going to master what ‘until it looks right’ means when my mom tells me to add milk to the potatoes. I like looking at ads at what I’d buy if I had all the money in the world or the bravery to try to shop on Black Friday. I like having football on the TV while we nap, going to the meeting, playing games, eating pie. What I really want to do that I have never done is see the lighting ceremony in our downtown area. I am hoping I can this year. I’ve been here 30 years and never experienced it. I mean I’ve seen the lights. I just haven’t seen them light up for the first time. Ya get me.

Wow. This thing is all over the place. Well, kinda like my brain I guess. You’re welcome.

To Travel, Always

So, what I’ve found is that watching TV is as much a vacation as being somewhere new. Also, I’ve found about 4 new shows I’d love to get into. Not enough to pay for cable, but I get how people get hooked on so many TV shows.

I met the nicest guy on the plane ride from Chicago to Fort Lauderdale. We talked the whole trip. Considering we took a detour to avoid a storm, it was about 2.5 hours of chatting. You can learn a lot about a person in that time. I love that about traveling. Everyone has a story – and I love when people choose to share their stories with me. He and his wife and their friends nearly missed boarding, so they were all split up. Lucky me, he was so pleasant. He also suggested, after getting to me a little bit, that I should write as well. But what to write? I just have no idea. I know that I love it, but I don’t know what interests people that I have the knowledge to write about. I can write about my experience, that’s all I got. Maybe it’ll be enough someday. I just find it more than coincidence that I continue to hear that from people in my life.

I just want one thing in my life that is mine, ya know? One thing about me that makes me, me. Everything that I do right now is shared by at least one of my family members or friends. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Having said that – what makes me, me? Is it writing? Maybe. I don’t know. I’m in a spot where everything is somewhat up in the air – I think that’s probably a good place to be. It means anything can happen, and I like that idea.

I’m in Fort Lauderdale. The views are incredible. While I will admit, staying on the Gulf side is better for sunsets, I’m quite excited about seeing the sunrise tomorrow morning. The sand is soft and the waves crashing on the shore is mesmerizing. I realize how lucky I am that I have been to so many places and continue to travel. Sometimes I get lonely, especially when couples make up the most of the clientele, however most of the time I relish the solitude. I am more of an independent free spirit than I ever really recognized before. Embracing, owning and honoring that abut myself has been an incredibly rewarding experience.

For now, NCIS is marathoning on USA, which I can watch because I have cable in my hotel room. Fancy. Tomorrow is the World Finals Sand Volleyball Tournament on the beach – along with reading, relaxing, exercising, and just being.

Soak it up.

Friday took forever to get here.

What if what I think is random isn’t so random?

Do you do things you don’t want to do because you know that even if you don’t want to it’s the right thing to do? Adulting.

I am surprised that I am apprehensive to go on vacation tomorrow considering I already traveled alone much further away, but I suppose it’s healthy to be a little afraid. Right? RIGHT?

I am looking forward to reading a lot.

How does one figure out what to write about? Just, generally speaking. Generally.

It’s funny, I see a list of movies that are leaving Netflix and I’m outraged that I didn’t even know some of them were AVAILABLE on Netflix and then I remember I watch the same 2 or 3 shows all the time and consider the fact that maybe I need to branch out more.

If I want to travel internationally again next year, I should start figuring out where I want to go now. Or soon-ish.

Figuring out who I am, what I like and what I want, and learning how to speak up and voice all of that, has been a terrifying and also quite rewarding experience. I get to exercise my right to say yes, and to say no, and deal with whatever the fallout is from those actions. I get to choose. It’s cool. I realize that speaking your mind and saying no when you don’t want to do something or yes when you do may not be new for a lot of people. It is new for me. I’m liking it a lot.

Tattoo in Florida? Mayyyyybe….

I love hobbies.

Can you imagine what it was like to discover the universe? I mean, to figure out that something in space was actually another planet, or to figure out the sun was the center of the universe? That we were actually moving around the sun and not the other way around? I wonder what it was like back then.

Hey! Conningsby! Come take a look through this telescope chap, and tell me what you see! By jove, it’s a planet I tell you!

Look I’m just saying it’d definitely be a life altering moment. If I had the smarts, I’d do science stuff. Space is fascinating guys.

Road workers have the most terrifying jobs. Ok maybe not most, but they’re up there. Driving home last night, watching guys put cones out on the INTERSTATE while people were flying around them going way too fast, I just pondered how absolutely terrifying it’d be to do that job. I also realized I had never seen them in the process of blocking off lanes.

I walked away from the house – the inspection was just awful. Too many big things to fix. It was sad, but I feel better about the decision today. So, back to the search.

I have actually felt an inspiration to paint something, which I’ve not had yet, or acknowledged at least. I’m looking forward to doing it, I just don’t know WHEN.

I’ve found that pictures hanging in my cubicle make me hate it less. I wonder if there’s a limit on how many personal items we can have at our desk. I have a handful, at least. I’ve never heard anything of the sort here, but at other big companies I have had friends who had to clear off personal items. Which I think is just ridiculous. Especially when we have no windows. If I have a troll with neon pink hair to keep me company on my desk, why should anyone care? (I don’t have one, but that’d be pretty sweet).

I got a guitar from my uncle to play for a while – I can’t wait. Hearing the strings, feeling them beneath my fingers, that full, rich sound, there’s nothing like it. I’m terribly out of practice, but the point is just to play. It’ll come back to me.

I’m sad to see summer go but I am ready for boots, hoodies and leaves crunching under my feet. Fall is my favorite. Just don’t think too much about what comes after fall. Stay in the moment, it’s much more fun.