What a hiatus!

I have not been around these parts in a minute! I’ve been using another medium to blog about some things near and dear that I don’t necessarily need everyone to know about but have to work through. With that, plus school, meetings, work, standing appointments, choir, orchestra, and dating, I’ve been incredibly busy.

Crazy how life gets good isn’t it?

Have you ever taken into consideration the random articles found on the roadways? I’m curious. I mentioned this on my Facebook, seeing a random shoe in the median. The responses were varied – some wondered, like me, if a person was so angry that throwing a shoe out of the window was the only natural response. Others thought that perhaps something terrible happened. One person said a ‘friend of hers’ thought that it was proof of an alien abduction. But I mean, I have seen some weird things on the roadside. Baby seat. Couch. Couch cushion. Bookshelf. Shoe. Backpack. I can’t imagine that all of these things bounced out of the back of a truck.

Sometimes I look at pictures of space, and of Earth, and of our Universe and I just get overwhelmed. Does that ever happen to you with anything? I just think about our planets in orbit around the sun, and how incredible it is that such a thing exists at all, and how so many things happen in such a big world that is actually tiny in comparison to the solar system it resides in while hurtling through space. Sometimes it’s a challenge for me to wrap my mind around the god thing, but when I think of all this, I’m convinced that the name doesn’t matter – there’s something out there bigger than me and I’m grateful.

Think about weather, and tides, and how plants and humans help each other out, and tell me that it wasn’t by design. Now look, I’m a firm believer in science and I’m not saying that the world was created in “7 days” by a supreme being. I don’t think there’s a puppet master pulling strings. What I am saying is that it isn’t just coincidence that humans breathe in oxygen and breathe out carbon dioxide, and that plants absorb carbon dioxide and emit oxygen. That’s one of many examples that I could provide, but I think at this point I’m starting to ramble. It’s just powerful stuff.

I’m *this* close to home-ownership again! Also *this* close to being done with class for the semester. Orchestra concert was Sunday and went off well. I had a few people in the audience this time which was pretty cool. Choir concert is in a month. Closing date for the house would be in a month. I’m dating a neat guy. I’m doing personal training at the gym, I’m sponsoring a gal who seems to really be trying, I’m participating in service commitments…

Basically what I’m saying is I’m so busy I think that sometimes I skate by on adrenaline and caffeine alone. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

I have a few friends who openly protest Thanksgiving, stating that America is celebrating genocide of the Native American population, and I know there are many others who believe that way. Lots of protests by Native American tribes take place on Thanksgiving. On the other hand, many Native Americans are supportive of Thanksgiving, as the main purpose of the day is to give thanks to whatever you believe in for the things we have in life. I think initially it was a day of thanks for the first successful harvest. Of course, there are those who will say history has been changed and what the books say does not accurately reflect what really happened. I guess we’ll never know for sure.What I love is that everyone is entitled to believe what they want. As long as you don’t force your beliefs on me, we’re good.

That being said, I love Thanksgiving, with all of the drama of trying to get the food prepared at the same time, making sure the potatoes aren’t too lumpy or too smooth. I swear, someday I’m going to master what ‘until it looks right’ means when my mom tells me to add milk to the potatoes. I like looking at ads at what I’d buy if I had all the money in the world or the bravery to try to shop on Black Friday. I like having football on the TV while we nap, going to the meeting, playing games, eating pie. What I really want to do that I have never done is see the lighting ceremony in our downtown area. I am hoping I can this year. I’ve been here 30 years and never experienced it. I mean I’ve seen the lights. I just haven’t seen them light up for the first time. Ya get me.

Wow. This thing is all over the place. Well, kinda like my brain I guess. You’re welcome.

A new project is like Christmas

I’m incredibly indecisive. That being said, I’ve been mulling over redoing my bedroom for some time now. I am just over the blue/brown palette I’ve used for oh…ever. So, I bought this painting:

Now, I can pick color based on that piece of artwork rather than guessing. Also, it opens up opportunities for colored accent furniture and the like, which translates to: I’ll be painting the furniture I already have because we all know I’m not buying new when I can redo old. I’m pretty excited about it.

It’s interesting to learn that I don’t like foods I once craved like mad.

My friends threw me a surprise 30th birthday party. Caught me completely off guard and was pretty outstanding. It’s nice to be reminded of the gifts I have today. My friends are awesome.

I walked right into a spider web this morning, half awake in my pajamas, stumbling outside to try to capture a picture of the sunrise off my deck. It was one of those moments where I kinda hoped someone saw me and laughed, because it was straight out of a movie. Luckily, the spider remained on his web over the door. Clearly, I don’t go out back much. The picture turned out ok though, so there’s that. (I ran inside and slammed the door like the scaredy-cat I am)

I have to figure out how to use the sander this weekend. I’ve only had it for a year…

If a guy reaches out to me on Facebook and says that he saw one of my posts from earlier in the week and sends me an article related to that post, is that flirting? Or just being nice? I can’t tell. To be honest, he could say “I think you’re really cute and I’d like to take you out” and I’d still probably ask him if he was sure.

I’m not a doctor! (Not relevant)

It was legitimately cool last night. In July! That’s crazy talk.

I’ve got at least 2 unfinished projects I’d like to complete before school starts in August. They’re not difficult, I don’t know why I don’t just do them. Procrastination! *sigh*

I got flowers at work today! I can’t remember if I’ve ever gotten flowers at the office before. I don’t think I have. They smell great, they’re beautiful, and I’m so grateful. My parents are the coolest.

So, I was thinking about Interstellar, when they *spoiler* go to the planet where Matt Damon is and start preparing to colonize it. He talks about the surface below. And I just wondered, why the hell wouldn’t he be living on said surface? Why didn’t that trip any flags for those guys? Desperation? Perhaps. Still love that movie though.

Speaking of movies with Matt Damon and space, I saw the preview for Martian and it looks really good. I’ll be seeing that.

Push-ups are no joke. The exercise, not the dessert. Although…

Trying to relearn everything I know about food is crazy. Planning trips to the grocery store and rethinking what to eat at each meal is proving to be a challenge. I’m up for it, but it’s a lot to handle.

I’m grateful today that I know I never have to be alone. There was a time in my life when it felt like I was in a big dark cave, unable to see the walls and the ceiling because it was so dark, and lonely, and isolated. I’m so glad my life is full today. I have some of the best friends and family I could ever have, which is more than I deserve. I am shown every day how lucky I am. I know I got all sappy – I’ll try to get back to regular programming.

I think I have 3 separate piles of clothes that need addressing at my house. One needs folded, one needs ‘fluffed’ and one needs washed. I feel like I’ve been behind ever since I’ve been back. Maybe this weekend I’ll catch up. *please note, this is said with extreme optimism*

Help.

I have two big pet peeves at work. Ready? 1) fingernail clipping. That is clearly a grooming issue that should be addressed at home. I get the occasional hangnail, but every finger? Come on. 2) Loud ringtones of pop songs. Look, I get it. My ringtone is the theme to Harry Potter. I’m a big dork, just like everyone else. But it’s hard for a VP to take me seriously if Katy Perry’s Roar plays full blast while I’m on the phone.

I have colored pencils and a therapy coloring book at home – it’s a great way to unplug and decompress. Highly recommend.

It’s a 4 day work week! Woo!

I sorta have a soundtrack to my life, because I obsessively listen to music over and over, and then even when it’s not on I hear it playing in my head. It can be fun. Also annoying. But mostly fun.

I enjoy several varieties of sushi. I don’t mind sharing with other people for a bigger selection. But so help me, if you get a roll that has raw fish in it, I am not giving you one of my hotel cali’s as a trade-off because no. I am not eating raw fish. (Just sayin)

When I try to meditate, i.e. clear my mind of all thoughts, my tinnitus gets louder, and then all I can think about is how loud my tinnitus is, and then wonder why I don’t always hear it or think about it, and then that’s all she wrote. Which is why I like yoga, and painting, and coloring. Because I’m distracted by something enough to not think about the tinnitus but also thoughts that would normally stick in my brain just pass right through.

Jurassic World is a must-see for those of you who enjoy cheesy action movies with a bit of gross and a whole lot of nostalgia. I really enjoyed it. My expectations were not exceptionally high, so I had that going for me. Also, Chris Pratt. ‘Nuff said.

Breakfast food is good at any time of the day or night.

I heard someone say yesterday that no moment is ever the same, and no moment can ever be exactly recreated. So, I’m going to just enjoy where I am and try to stop planning for a future I can’t predict, and stop dwelling on a past that cannot change and cannot be duplicated. Accept, enjoy, relax.

I’ve been holding out on redeeming my points work because I wanted to get enough to get another year of Netflix for free. So I got enough, and it turns out they don’t offer that anymore! I’m going to have to become a paying member next year! Sad day. (I get that it’s really cheap, but still)

So, if I’ve done the calculations correctly, I have 3 more classes after this semester, then my Kirkpatrick series which is 9 credit hours, and then I’m done with my degree! This has been a long time coming.

What is it about grandmas? They always want to give you food and candy, even if they’re not your grandma. It must be something that happens to the brain as it ages, where it automatically assumes that people under 50 are not eating enough, therefore they must be sent home with food.

Happy Monday.

Rollercoaster

The human ability to feel multiple emotions at one time is baffling to me. Stop. Just stop it.

I could not work as a promotions person at a cable company, or anywhere else for that matter. No, I don’t want your bundle package with “free” HBO price protected for 40 dollars a month for 12 months. To pat my own back, I did let her complete her delivery before I politely explained that I’m the only person in my home and I don’t watch cable. Of course came the second attempt at a smaller deal for less money. To which I again replied, no thank you. It takes tenacity that I just don’t have. Sales. I am not cut out for it.

You ever get that feeling where physically you know you’re hungry but mentally there is no desire to eat? It doesn’t happen to me very often because, quite frankly, I love food. But that’s where I am today. I know I have a terrible headache because I have had no food or drink since I woke up 5 hours ago, but ugh.

Speaking of food and water – for any Marvel fan out there, please explain something to me if possible. Does Heimdall ever get a break to eat/drink/sleep/potty? I mean, the dude watches over all 9 realms. He’s got special abilities that let him do so. Do those abilities extend to the toilet? Or to dreams? If not, who else is qualified to take over that job while he gets a little shut eye?

When having a bad day, there is something about seeing my mom or dad that allows me to not be strong and just have a cry about it. I’m grateful that my relationship with my parents is such that I am able to do so. I know that is not the case for everyone.

Having a Monster in place of a meal is probably not a good idea, eh?

How does someone steal my credit card information when I have the card on me? Who uses said credit card at a petrol station in the UK for $1.55? I mean, is that the pre-auth charge for a tank of petrol? To credit Capital One, that happened this morning and they put my account on lock down almost immediately. I had two fraudulent transactions worth less than $5. Fist bump Capital One fraud department.

Apparently I had confused or combined RoboCop and Terminator, because I thought RoboCop was a bad guy. (he’s not)

I am reminded that my health plan at work sucks when the doctor suggests I get a CT scan for my head, and I choose to pass because my deductible is so high that I’m unwilling to pay for it. It took me a week before I finally admitted I might need to go to the doctor after an injury! They did the manual test in the office and everything was fine, so I’m fine. I’m still paying off the balance from my bout with the flu last year that left me in the hospital for three days. #grownupproblems

This line from Desiderata gets me every time. It’s on my wall at work and I try to read it daily.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.