Friday.

Sometimes when I drive, I have something in my passenger seat like a card or a book, or something else trivial that I certainly don’t need while I’m paying attention to the road, and I’ll make a turn, and said item will go flying off the seat and I react as if it’s fallen into some abyss never to be seen again. Usually grumbling some profanity at the same time. I did this the other day and realized what an overreaction it was. Like, it’ll be there when I park the car.

I’m finding tattoo ideas quicker than I can save money to get them.

Going with the car theme, sneezing in the car is one of the most terrifying things ever. I mean, I know that your eyes only close for half a second, but a lot can happen in a half a second! And there’s NO control over it.

I was surprised to hear that someone is inspired by me. It is flattering, and it’s an honor, but I immediately wonder why. I just imagine all the things that make me so so awkward. I trip over myself constantly, I suffer from crippling self-doubt and insecurity, sometimes I stutter on the phone when I’m trying to run a call and I have a knack for letting things go bad in the fridge. I take an excessive amount of pictures of my cats and I listen to the same music and watch the same shows/movies over and over. I spend an inappropriate amount of time in Walgreen’s trying to decide on new body wash and have almost no impulse control when it comes to Amazon online shopping. I’m just saying. I’m grateful that we as people see things in others that they don’t often see.

When someone says, you really look like you need to have that cup of coffee, is that a veiled way of saying good lord you look tired? I think it might be. That’s ok, it’s probably true. Also, I do need this cup of coffee.

Doing laundry yesterday, I was so proud of myself for getting everything in one load that I didn’t think about whether or not I should’ve. Folding it will be a nightmare. Notice I said will be, because I certainly didn’t do it yesterday.

Sometimes when I hear people sigh, I wonder if it’s a sigh because they’re frustrated, or angry, or remembering something fondly, or if they just really needed to take a big deep breath. I sometimes take deep breaths because it feels good to breathe in as deeply as I can and exhale audibly. I can’t help it. It feels nice. You should try it.

Isn’t it amazing how a person can be in the periphery of your life, and then all of a sudden, they radiate so brightly that you can’t help but notice who they are and what they do and how they make you feel? Friend, coworker, significant other, it doesn’t matter. Sometimes a person just illuminates my life, and I’m tuned in enough these days to notice when they shine. I think that’s wonderful.

I am getting closer to perfecting the pan-cooked steak. I know.

What a hiatus!

I have not been around these parts in a minute! I’ve been using another medium to blog about some things near and dear that I don’t necessarily need everyone to know about but have to work through. With that, plus school, meetings, work, standing appointments, choir, orchestra, and dating, I’ve been incredibly busy.

Crazy how life gets good isn’t it?

Have you ever taken into consideration the random articles found on the roadways? I’m curious. I mentioned this on my Facebook, seeing a random shoe in the median. The responses were varied – some wondered, like me, if a person was so angry that throwing a shoe out of the window was the only natural response. Others thought that perhaps something terrible happened. One person said a ‘friend of hers’ thought that it was proof of an alien abduction. But I mean, I have seen some weird things on the roadside. Baby seat. Couch. Couch cushion. Bookshelf. Shoe. Backpack. I can’t imagine that all of these things bounced out of the back of a truck.

Sometimes I look at pictures of space, and of Earth, and of our Universe and I just get overwhelmed. Does that ever happen to you with anything? I just think about our planets in orbit around the sun, and how incredible it is that such a thing exists at all, and how so many things happen in such a big world that is actually tiny in comparison to the solar system it resides in while hurtling through space. Sometimes it’s a challenge for me to wrap my mind around the god thing, but when I think of all this, I’m convinced that the name doesn’t matter – there’s something out there bigger than me and I’m grateful.

Think about weather, and tides, and how plants and humans help each other out, and tell me that it wasn’t by design. Now look, I’m a firm believer in science and I’m not saying that the world was created in “7 days” by a supreme being. I don’t think there’s a puppet master pulling strings. What I am saying is that it isn’t just coincidence that humans breathe in oxygen and breathe out carbon dioxide, and that plants absorb carbon dioxide and emit oxygen. That’s one of many examples that I could provide, but I think at this point I’m starting to ramble. It’s just powerful stuff.

I’m *this* close to home-ownership again! Also *this* close to being done with class for the semester. Orchestra concert was Sunday and went off well. I had a few people in the audience this time which was pretty cool. Choir concert is in a month. Closing date for the house would be in a month. I’m dating a neat guy. I’m doing personal training at the gym, I’m sponsoring a gal who seems to really be trying, I’m participating in service commitments…

Basically what I’m saying is I’m so busy I think that sometimes I skate by on adrenaline and caffeine alone. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

I have a few friends who openly protest Thanksgiving, stating that America is celebrating genocide of the Native American population, and I know there are many others who believe that way. Lots of protests by Native American tribes take place on Thanksgiving. On the other hand, many Native Americans are supportive of Thanksgiving, as the main purpose of the day is to give thanks to whatever you believe in for the things we have in life. I think initially it was a day of thanks for the first successful harvest. Of course, there are those who will say history has been changed and what the books say does not accurately reflect what really happened. I guess we’ll never know for sure.What I love is that everyone is entitled to believe what they want. As long as you don’t force your beliefs on me, we’re good.

That being said, I love Thanksgiving, with all of the drama of trying to get the food prepared at the same time, making sure the potatoes aren’t too lumpy or too smooth. I swear, someday I’m going to master what ‘until it looks right’ means when my mom tells me to add milk to the potatoes. I like looking at ads at what I’d buy if I had all the money in the world or the bravery to try to shop on Black Friday. I like having football on the TV while we nap, going to the meeting, playing games, eating pie. What I really want to do that I have never done is see the lighting ceremony in our downtown area. I am hoping I can this year. I’ve been here 30 years and never experienced it. I mean I’ve seen the lights. I just haven’t seen them light up for the first time. Ya get me.

Wow. This thing is all over the place. Well, kinda like my brain I guess. You’re welcome.

Hollabackatcha

How does one decide to go into the wig business? Ya don’t see wig stores very often, do you? I don’t. Is it a family business?

There is haze in my town, in the Midwest, from wildfires in Canada. That’s pretty crazy.

Snapchat is so dumb yet I love it so much. I get goofy pictures from my friends throughout the day that break up an otherwise potentially boring/stressful/monotonous day.

Venus and Jupiter are putting on a show tonight. You should check it out. Space is cool.

I wish there were a trial period for new pillows. Like, hey, this looked good in the store, but 2 days with it and my neck feels like death. But no, I tried returning a pillow and was declined. So, I have a growing assortment of decorative pillows because of the fails that I’ve tried.

It is getting outta control. (Note: this is a google image and not my actual pillow pile)

Sometimes, like today, my coffee needs coffee.

You ever look at your calendar and think, man this month looks pretty open, and then 3 days later there are things going on like, every day? I’m glad school doesn’t start until the end of August. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful my life is full. But the struggle after work between napping and the gym is real. (I brought gym clothes with me to work to combat having to go home to change and falling on the couch instead, however I’m debating.)

Coming in to the office and complaining before your ass hits your seat is generally not a great way to start the day, for anyone. #headphonesforthewin

I drove the nicest BMW this weekend. And now I know what my goal is for my next vehicle.

Sometimes adulting is lame – I want to run through the sprinklers and eat pb & j wrapped in a towel with grass in my feet. (I get that I can do that, but I want to do it right now, rather than be at work, see, there’s the dilemma)

Cereal is one of the best things ever.

I read an article yesterday about 15 things grocery stores do to trap you there and make you spend more money, only fueling my hatred of the grocery store.

I’m finally joining this century and purchasing a blu-ray player with wi-fi access. Meaning I can go from my Roku and DVD player to one device that does all streaming, DVD and Blu-Ray in one spot. Next purchase will be new surround sound. And someday, a newer TV. One thing at a time.

My title is a Psych reference. Just, for the record.

I really hate titles.

Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries is the latest Netflix adventure. Set in 1920 Australia. It’s awesome.

I’m tired of waking up anxious every day. What’s that about? Life is too short to worry. I wish the knowledge of that alone was enough to keep the worry away.

Cuddling cats are one of my favorite things about being home.

I love the sky, and the way it can be painted variously throughout the day.

I wondered why barns were red. I thought perhaps that was weird until I searched Google and it was the third auto filled question.

On that note, have you ever seen debris from afar on the interstate and thought it was a body? That happened to me today. It was terrifying. Then really embarrassing.

Hot yoga. Love it.

Sometimes I just wonder why, generally speaking, about everything. I rarely get an answer and most of the time I probably don’t want to know, but I still do.

Going to bed on Sunday is tough. It means work in the morning. It’s especially tough after a vacation.

Here’s to the end of a five day break from work.

Bzzz

Why to fluorescent bulbs buzz?

What makes the air smell like rain? You know the smell I’m talking about. (if you’re from the midwest at least) I love it.

I don’t know why I sometimes feel compelled to sleep on my couch.

Monday workday is over halfway complete.

34 days to my trip.

Could Iron Man have been cast any better? I mean really. (I might have watched that yesterday)

Heart and Brain comics speak to me. I just love them.

 (I hate grocery shopping)

Do you ever wonder about things like superstitions? Like, is there one if it is stormy and sunny at the same time? And who comes up with those? Where do they originate? They have to start somewhere. This is why history intrigues me.

I wonder how much I’ll actually keep in touch with people while I’m out of town. I should really get in to Verizon and ask about international call plans or something. Maybe Skype would be a better option. I didn’t plan to bring my laptop but I suppose I could in my carry-on. Hmm. I wonder what kind of power converter I need for my plugs.

A whole bathroom of stalls. I’m talking 10 stalls, I’m the only one using the stall, and one of the people who comes in behind me chooses the stall right next to me. Why? WHY? Then comes the cross-stall talking. I can’t do that. It was all kinds of awkward.

I wonder a lot of things. Does everyone wonder a lot of things? Is that normal? I think my brain is just constantly on. On overdrive sometimes.

Hello

I can’t walk into the break room and NOT hit stop on a microwave if they have extra time on them.

The movie You’ve Got Mail is full of obsolete references. Book stores are a thing of the past anymore (I think Barnes and Noble is holding on by a thread) and I’m not sure of the numbers but I’d guess that AOL usage has dropped significantly as well. (I still love that movie, Meg Ryan’s hair was outstanding)

Do you ever drive and wonder where the other people are driving to? I like to imagine that someone driving way too fast weaving through traffic is speeding to get a hospital to see the birth of a baby or something. It lessens the incredulity I feel.

I am always amazed at how people come into my life at the exact moment I need them.

Something I have learned is that most of the time, I just don’t really care if you like me or not, which is a far cry from where I was a few years ago. It’s not that I behave badly and don’t care. I take principled actions and do the best I can with what I have, and I try to just do the next right thing in front of me, whatever that is. Sometimes I’m more successful at that than others. It’s just that, I know now that I will not be friends with everyone in the universe, and that’s ok. There are people that I don’t like. I respect them, and I can appreciate what they do as far as their career or their goal to help people or whatever the case may be, but I don’t like them. So I should expect the same goes for me. There’s a freedom in not freaking out about making sure everyone wants to be my friend.

Bagged wet grass has to be one of the worst smelling things on the planet. Yuck.

On the other hand, a freshly mowed lawn is incredibly rewarding.

I tried cooking a roast in the slow cooker. It came out like a rock. However, the salsa chicken I made was on point. (I’ve been given instructions for when I attempt to cook a roast again)

There is nothing like waking up next to someone and being pulled into a morning cuddle.

Cleaning out my house of all the things I don’t wear/won’t use anymore is like losing a hundred pounds. Seriously, the previously unusable third bedroom at my house is now clean, arranged, smells like sage and citrus (one of my favorites) and has become my yoga/stretching/work-out room. I love it.

At this point in my life, when I have things to do it is harder to nap. I get this tight, anxious feeling in my chest which is not conducive to sleeping.

(p.s. I’m definitely changing the title of this to Random Musings)